Verbal Abuse: A Form of Child Abuse

Source:Juvenile Protective Association

Before becoming a mom, I had my fair share of observing children getting yelled at and even spanked in public places. I would always feel enraged when the parent was using verbal aggression and profanity to discipline their child. I vowed I would never do such a demeaning act as a parent especially when I learned that verbal abuse is a form of child abuse. Although many parents might believe that verbal abuse is a form of discipline, in reality, verbal abuse is an aspect of child abuse  which is “any behavior or lack of behavior by parents and caregivers that results in deliberate harm to a child’s physical or psychological well-being”(Knox and Schacht,2014). What is most devastating are the negative long-term effects of verbal abuse such as “acts of rejection, condemnation, yelling, nagging, threats of violence, and slapping”(Hutchison and Mueller,2008). Therefore, it is extremely crucial for parents to become aware of the damage created from verbal abuse in order to refrain from using it as a form a discipline and instead learn of appropriate forms of discipline that will not damage their child’s psychological well-being.

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A negative effect pertaining to verbal abuse of a child includes increased physical aggression as teenagers (Spillane-Grieco,2000). Spillane-Grieco has done research of verbal abuse of teenagers and he found that the teens in the study were victimized through verbal aggression mostly from their mothers which can suggest that it can lead to “serious negative effects on child and adolescent development and behavior” (Spillane-Grieco, 2000). For instance, teens that were crime offenders in comparison to non-offenders reported more that they had experienced verbal aggression from their parents. Unfortunately, children and teens that are verbally abused don’t bear bruises like those who are physically abused and thus often don’t get the help in time and instead start getting attention when they start to break the law.  

Surprisingly, another negative effect associated to child verbal abuse is that the children can “become [future] targets for further victimization at the hands of their peers” (Hutchinson and Mueller,2008). The findings of this study “indicate that parental emotional and verbal abuse is a significant predictor of peer-related victimization” especially since they develop a low self-esteem due the abuse. This might also be a reason why a victimized child can fall into an abusive relationship in their later years as adults.

Source: renewedhopecenter.org

Thus, there is a great need to help parents understand the damage of verbal abuse and informing them of methods of discipline which are most effective such as time-out or withdrawal of privileges (Knox and Schact,2014).  It is also important that parents make sure they provide their children with messages of love, encouragement, praise and acceptance (Knox and Schacht,2014).Now, as a mother of two and soon to be three, I begin to understand the importance of parenting adequately. Also, with the emergence of the Internet it is also possible of learning effective ways of parenting without leaving the house. Some sites I found useful were https://www.zerotothree.org/, https://childcareaware.org/,and                                             http://www.webmd.com/parenting/guide/discipline-tactics
 All in all, I am grateful that my mom never used verbal aggression towards me and never allowed my father to verbally abuse her because her actions helped me understand that such form of abuse is not only demeaning but intolerable.

Works Cited:

Hutchinson, L., & Mueller, D. (2008). Sticks and stones and broken bones: The influence of parental verbal abuse on peer related victimization.Western Criminology Review,9(1), 17.

Knox, D., & Schacht, C. (2014). Choices in relationships: An introduction to marriage and the family. S.l.: Wadsworth.

Spillane-Grieco, E. (2000). From parent verbal abuse to teenage physical aggression?. Child and Adolescent Social Work Journal, 17(6), 411-430.